ASRC of Seattle Seeks Anxiety Specialist / Staff Psychologist

June 12, 2013 – 3:00 pm

ANXIETY SPECIALIST, ANXIETY AND STRESS REDUCTION CENTER OF SEATTLE
The Anxiety and Stress Reduction Center of Seattle (ASRC), invites applications for a staff psychologist position beginning June 2013. Staff will provide individual therapy for clients with the full range of anxiety and stress related disorders, as well as trichotillomania and other body-focused repetitive behaviors, tic disorders and body dysmorphic disorder. The ideal applicant will have strong interest and experience in specializing in some or all of the areas above and have demonstrated superb clinical skills. We will consider either a child/adolescent/family or adult focused clinician.

The ASRC is a thriving outpatient center specializing in anxiety disorders comprised of over ten clinical psychologists and one psychiatrist. We offer comprehensive administrative services and billing, benefits, weekly consultation team with experts in their fields, beautiful office space in downtown Seattle and opportunities to participate in our research and quality assurance programs. The ASRC is part of a larger network, the Evidence Based Treatment Centers of Seattle. The EBT Centers include specialty centers focused on Dialectical Behavior Therapy, Eating and Weight Disorders and a Child / Adolescent treatment center. EBT invests in research, quality assurance and a postdoctoral fellowship program. Emphasis is on evidence-based, compassionate treatment and we place a high value on monitoring the progress of our clients throughout treatment and our team approach. For more information please visit our websites, www.asrcseattle.com and www.ebtseattle.com.

Applicants will be considered who have a masters or doctoral degree in clinical psychology or social work and significant experience in anxiety and stress related disorders or treating BFRBs/tic disorders.

Please e-mail or fax a letter of interest, curriculum vitae, and three references to:

Stacy Shaw Welch, Ph.D, Director, Anxiety and Stress Reduction Center of Seattle.
E-mail: swelch@asrcseattle.com; fax: (206) 374-0108.

By tlcprograms | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a Comment

Skin Picking: From a Male Perspective…. Guest Post by SkinPickGuy

April 9, 2013 – 9:24 am

According to medical research, dermatillomania is more common among women than men. Unfortunately, there’s no consensus on what the actual differences are. Part of the problem is awareness about dermatillomania. Many people have no idea that they are suffering from a mental disorder. But perhaps there are also other reasons for this that we don’t understand right now.

I am in the minority. I am male and have had dermatillomania for 20 to 30 years. I’ve had it for most of my life and I can’t even remember when I first started picking. It’s just a part of my life. Sometimes my picking can be out of control where I pick for hours a day, while other times I don’t even think about it and don’t pick at all.

So what is it like being male and having dermatillomania? I don’t think there are many real differences. But perhaps the biggest one is make up. I don’t wear make-up, thus I can’t easily hide my scars or scabs. On my blog, I read a lot of posts where people have tips for covering up with make-up, or asking which make-up products are good for covering scars. I don’t really get to do that. My face is always my own bare face with all the scars, scabs, spots and other imperfections.

I remember too many times when I picked my face in the morning and then had to go to school or work. I had to quickly try to stop the bleeding and then somehow avoid bleeding throughout the day without wearing make-up or putting on a band-aid. Usually I would leave the house with a few napkins so I could quickly mop up any blood oozing out of my wounds on my way to work and hope that it would stop bleeding by the time I got there.

I don’t usually pick my face, at least not anymore. I can remember some spots very clearly, like one on my upper lip, another around my neck. A few around my cheek. They are how I can see the passage of time, see how my life has progressed. After picking and opening the wound, many spots seem to last a very long time, usually months. Sometimes I can still see a brown spot or a deep indentation on my face which shows evidence of a long ago picking session a year or more later.  Yes, skin heals itself. Skin does grow back but it can also leave a scar or a dark spot that can take years to completely go away.  It seems that just a few minutes of face picking can mean months or years of dealing with healing and spots.

One advantage to being a male skin picker, however, is facial hair. I’m lucky because my facial hair grows very quickly. I frequently have a five o’clock shadow at 11am. So I can use facial hair to hide some of the scars on my face. If I have a spot on my face that I’m actively picking, then I can hide behind my goatee or beard. Many people won’t look too closely, especially underneath a bunch of facial hair.

Sometimes when I feel like shaving off my beard, I find out that I have some active spots that are bleeding or that have scarred over. That’s when I feel an instant pang of regret. Not that I shouldn’t have picked, but that I shouldn’t have shaved my face yet. If I had waited just a few more days or a week, the spot might look better. But now I have to walk around the world with bloody scars or scabs on my face.

Most of the time, I don’t even remember doing this damage to myself when I grow out my beard. I probably use my facial hair as a crutch to pick at my face, or touch my face more than usual. To anyone looking at me, I can pretend that I am just rubbing my facial hair or scratching my chin and thinking thoughtfully about something. But most likely I’m really just picking my face under the cover of my beard.

Because I’m a guy, I can probably get away with more face picking than some women. One of the lies I used to tell people if they ever asked about blood or scabs on my face is that it was a shaving accident. It’s such an easy excuse and instantly shifts the focus away from my picking. “Oh, that thing, I just cut myself shaving.” I can use this excuse over and over because it’s true that shaving will tend to open up wounds. If I shave everyday, it can also open up the wound again. It’s difficult to avoid shaving over a scar or healing spot otherwise you’ll leave a patch of hair that will keep on growing and it looks terrible.

I think the big difference is in expectations. The world expects women to be pickers. After all, women are more often hair pullers or cutters and it’s more common that they have eating disorders, too. However, I have definitely pulled my eyebrows compulsively, and was worried about having trichotillomania especially when I would pick my scalp and pull out some hairs in the process. I also have an eating disorder, but I never want to talk about that either, and neither do a lot of men. It’s just more common for women, so men aren’t usually suspected.

Perhaps a lot of the differences between male and female pickers is that men have to be more secretive. Rather than picking my face, I pick places that people don’t normally see in every day situations like my scalp, back, thighs, crotch, or buttocks. For the most part, I avoid picking my face, fingers or arms or anyplace visible.

I also feel like men aren’t scrutinized as much as women, in terms of cuts or acne scars or other facial blemishes. My guy friends don’t usually ask me what’s wrong with my face, but I find that women hear these kinds of exclamations from other people a lot more. Women are expected to have perfect skin or at least can cover it up. Men can have acne or can bleed or be a bit scarred over, while women are judged more for these kinds of things.

Overall, I don’t think men have it any worse or any better than women with dermatillomania. We all have our distinct challenges, but I think that the most important thing is to help each other. On my blog, I sometimes get questions about make-up or what kinds of creams/oils can help heal skin and I don’t have all the answers. In these cases, I answer to the best of my knowledge, but I mostly appeal to my followers and readers to help me out. The derma community is so supportive and open that there will always be someone that comes along that has some answers or their own particular perspective.

That’s what I love about the derma community online. It’s about sharing experiences and sharing knowledge and supporting each other. It doesn’t matter if you’re male or female, or straight or gay or trans or anything else. You’re just a fellow skin picker and you’re part of the community. You are not alone and there is help available.

— Skin Pick Guy lives in New York City, and has had dermatillomania for over 30 years. He is dedicated to spreading awareness about skin picking and helping to support other dermatillomania sufferers. Visit his blog, Diary of a Skin Picker (http://diaryofaskinpicker.tumblr.com) or follow him on Twitter (http://www.twitter.com/skinpickguy).

By TLC | Posted in dermatillomania, Resources, Sharing, skin picking | Tags: , , , , , , | Comments (2)

Frequently Asked Questions Regarding the TLC Annual Conference

March 28, 2013 – 11:02 am

Hi everyone!
We thought we’d share some of the most frequently asked questions by potential conference attendees. Please add your own questions in the comments! Staff will do their best to answer.

Q.  Who typically attends the annual conference?

A.  Approximately 450 people attend the annual conference.

  • 19% are an adult sufferer of Trichotillomania,
  • 10% are an adult sufferer of Dermatillomania,
  • 12% are a child sufferer of Trichotillomania and/or Dermatillomania,
  • 13% are teen sufferers of Trichotillomania,
  • 6% are teen sufferers of Dermatillomania,
  • 30% are parents/caregiver of a child or teen sufferer,
  • 10% are professionals (researchers, doctors, therapists, presenters

Q.  Will my child have the opportunity to meet other children his or her own age?

A. Yes, the workshops are divided into categories where the children, teens and young adults participate in specific age appropriate workshops.  They are encouraged to attend these workshops without their parents, and to build relationships with their peers. This also allows parents, and their children, to speak freely in sessions.

Q.  In theory that sounds good, but does that really happen?

A. Friday evening starts off with workshops that are focused on relationship building and interactions.  The following cocktail hour will also have an ice-breaking activity and an opportunity to socialize.  Every year, there are teens or kids that first walk in perhaps a little uncomfortable. These children are encouraged to participate as much or little as they are comfortable with.  For some kids, it helps to simply be in the presence of others who have had similar experiences.  For others, by the end of the first evening, the kids and teens are laughing and carrying on as if they’ve been friends forever. It does not take long to see packs of children or teens hanging out together. This is one of our favorite things about the conference: seeing these kids drop their shame and shyness and just be themselves. The younger children are running around and the teens find the pool deck or similar location to share their experiences.  All our meals are taken in the main conference room, and it is perfectly normal at this conference to join a table of strangers, and introduce yourself.  Every child experiences the Conference in his/her own way, there is no “right” way to participate.    Some join the group of kids or teens and travel as a pack, others have a quieter experience, observing others and taking in the experience slowly.

Q.  My child wears a hair piece.   Should he or she take it off? 

A.  All attendees are encouraged to come to conference in whatever way they feel most comfortable.  There will be delegates, who will clearly be balding, and pulling, some will wear bandannas, etc., and others will be wearing hair pieces.  Hair Club is our sponsor so they will be able to demonstrate the hair pieces to anyone who is interested.  Some young people might take off their wigs in public for the first time because they feel less isolated, but there is never any pressure.  There is no standard expectation of attendees, please come and be comfortable.

Q. My child only pulls her lashes/brows/from a small spot. Will seeing other people who have more severe cases make my child’s trich get worse?

A. Trich is an individual disorder. While many people with hair pulling disorder might migrate pulling spots, where one pulls or picks from is of unique interest to the person engaging in the behavior.  Being in a room with other kids who pick or pull can generally be good for the kids.  The experience can  help them feel less isolated, gain more support for their struggles, and generate some great ideas for creative problem solving. For some kids, though, the environment may feel overwhelming.  Just as we are suggesting that parents take care of themselves, we encourage kids to do the same.  Generally the kids/teens find spending times with others (whether more severe behaviors or not) to be extremely positive for many reasons.  However, if your child is not, allow your child to take breaks and take care of him/herself.  There will be staff members and professionals available to help guide and support you and your child to help make the conference a positive experience.

Q.  What will I learn, and why should I come?

A.  The first and probably most lasting thing you will learn is that you are not alone whether you are a sufferer or a caregiver.

At the conference you can expect opportunities to share with others, if that is your wish, or attend a discussion on the most recent research with leading researchers in this field, or to acquire some new life skills that will help you along this journey. You might take a class on developing a self-help treatment plan. You might get an understanding of what medications help, and which ones don’t. You’ll certainly have a chance to meet others who understand, exchange contact info, and set up a support network of new friends.

It is important to remember that the conference is only 2 full days, beginning Friday evening and ending Sunday at lunch.  Arrive at the conference with an open mind and open heart, look at the program, and decide what sessions might suit your needs best.  To facilitate this learning, talk to others, especially people who have ribbons on their name tags because they are likely more involved in the details of the conference, and may be able to direct you to an appropriate session or can talk with you if you have questions or are feeling overwhelmed.

Q.  Is the conference good value for the dollars?

A. it’s true that the cost of the conference may seem expensive at $325.00 (member, early registration). But, when comparing the opportunity to spend the weekend with the best treatment providers in the world  to the cost of one hour of CBT treatment (which ranges from $100-200/hour, more for experienced clinicians), it really is an incredible value. Registration also includes most meals.

We strive very hard to keep the costs for attending the conference as low as possible, so that we are able to ensure that the conference can be accessible to all those who wish to attend.  Partial scholarships are available to assist with the costs of the conference.  If you would like to apply for a scholarship, we would encourage you to do so by contacting leslie@trich.org   In addition to scholarships, TLC offers installment plans. Our goal is to reach out to people suffering from Dermatillomania and Trichotillomania, and our staff will help as much as possible to help you attend this event.  TLC is very confident that first time delegates will have an amazing experience with much learning and sharing, and that you will have exceeded your expectations of the conference, and dispelled your worries about having good value for your dollars.

Q.  Do I have to go to all the sessions?

A.  Part of recovery from BFRB’s is learning to take care of yourself. Therefore, while we ask that you pre-select your workshops, we do not take attendance, and you can change your mind about attending a particular workshop at any time. Attend the sessions that you are moved to, or, if you feel tired and overwhelmed, take a break! Sit in the hall and chat with new friends! Do what feels right to you.

Q.  Will there be an opportunity to discuss individual concerns or meet with professionals?

A.  This conference is unique in that it is attended by sufferers, caregivers, and professionals.  While the sessions are focused on a specific topic, at the end of each session there is an opportunity to ask questions of the presenter, and most certainly presenters will be eating and socializing in the same conference areas as the delegates, and so you may have an opportunity to participate in a discussion with a professional, but he or she will be unable to provide individual consultations.

Q.  What percentage of people return to the conference?

A. About 50% of conference attendees have never attended a TLC event before. The other 50% have attended some type of event hosted by TLC. Because the conference is in a different location every year, this number changes a bit. The attendance of the conference continues to rise, and this year we expect a record number of delegates at 500.

Q.  Is it families who attend or single parents with their child?

A.  Both! Each year we see more and more men.  The predominant family is mother and child, but having said that, there are also a number of dads and their child, and a number of larger families including parents, grandparents or siblings.

Q.  What should I bring to the conference? 

A.  The conference is very casual, so wear what you feel comfortable in.  The dinner event on Saturday evening is very casual as well and you will feel comfortable in your jeans or something dressier, but there is no need to pack fancy clothes.  Cameras are welcome, but please do not take pictures of delegates without their prior consent.  Please bring with you a notebook and pen.  You may also bring a recorder to record sessions for your personal review later!

If you have other questions not answered here, we would love to hear them!  Please email questions to leslie@trich.org or call 831-457-1004.

By TLC | Posted in Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , | Comments (2)

How I Completed The Perfect Pull

March 22, 2013 – 2:45 pm

How I Completed The Perfect Pull

By Lindsay Woolman

Recently, I published my first novel, The Perfect Pull. I suppose I took the old adage, “write what you know,” and made a story out of it about a teenage girl.

I have always had long, pretty hair. People give me strange looks when I tell them I have trich. Yet, I fit the typical scenario: I started when I was 11, thought I was crazy for awhile, and have pulled until my arms hurt. Only I don’t pull my head hair, and have never pulled enough lashes or brows for it to be obvious.

This allows me a choice. I can decide whether I want to tell people or not. Yet, I have found it to be mostly empowering to be open. For a time I was running around telling everyone. Now, I’m quieter about it, but still willing to admit that this is who I am.

When I decided I wanted to write a book about a character with the same problem as me, the hardest thing was the ending. How do you wrap up a story about trich in a nice, clean way?

I did it by taking my character to a support group and giving her the same realization I had many years ago. The best thing I ever did for my trich was to go to a ten-week closed support group run by a therapist. I had, up until that point, accepted that trich was going to a life long problem. It was something I could live with. I could at least be grateful it wasn’t life threatening, at least not really.

At this group I met all kinds of pullers. It was eye opening. At first you walk into the room and if you were an outsider you would have had NO idea what we all had in common. Then you hear the stories and being the youngest person, I was hit with a realization: I could get better. I had my whole life ahead.

I decided to try to quit over the ten-week period. Except trich is like any addiction. You still have it inside, but it goes to sleep.

It’s similar to alcoholics who stop drinking, then relapse, then stop, then relapse. This is how recovery goes when it’s real. It is hitting milestones and then failing and then picking yourself up again and hitting milestones with your eye on the goal. Then one day you look at the calendar and realize you’re up to about three years of being pull free (more of less).

I always knew in the back of my mind that a novel with a main character who had trich would be a great contribution because it’s so relevant. It was another milestone I wanted to reach.

My story: too boring. So I made up a story about a girl in high school who had trich and started writing it.

Beautiful things can come from pain. I finished the book and tried to find a publisher because I felt like that would give trichotillomania more exposure to an audience of teenage readers. However, in the end, I decided to publish The Perfect Pull myself. I’m proud and amazed to have actually written it, let alone finished it.

The ending was hard, but endings are always hard.

I’m happy about what I created and the lives that might change from reading it. However, it’s kind of funny now because I’m facing the next challenge. Marketing it. I know at some point I have to go into a high school and talk about both my book and the disorder. I also plan to write more books — and maybe one of those books will do well enough that The Perfect Pull will get some attention.

Life just keeps throwing curve balls, but I think that is the point. Keep your eyes on the milestones (one day, one week, one month, one year) and keep moving ahead.

Buy The Perfect Pull on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/The-Perfect-Pull-Lindsay-Woolman/dp/0988515407/ref=tmm_pap_title_0

Join me on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theperfectpull

By TLC | Posted in Uncategorized | Tags: , , , | Comments (5)

Living with Trichotillomania: An Opportunity?

February 27, 2013 – 10:53 am

Guest Post by Sandy Rosenblatt
http://myopportunityis.com/trichotillomania-hair-pulling/
Twitter: @sandybeach28

All of us have secrets.

We learn to live with them. We usually keep them close. And of all of them, there’s usually one biggie. One we hope and pray will never come out. But what are we so afraid would happen if others discovered our secret? Why do we hold it so tightly against our chests?

I have been living with Trichotillomania (TTM) for 21 years. I pull out my upper eyelashes, and I believed that if people noticed or I shared this fact, they would stop liking or loving me. I was sure they would judge me, tell others what a freak I was. I did everything in my power to make sure no one would ever notice. I lived in extreme shame.

Applying my dark black eyeliner became an art form. When I slept at someone’s house I washed my face, but never removed my eyeliner. In fact, I woke up in the middle of the night just to reapply it so that in the morning it would be just as perfect as when I’d fallen asleep. I was positive people wouldn’t accept me if they knew I pulled out my hair. And I was even more positive that if they did find out, if they didn’t judge me for pulling, they’d reject me for the fact that I didn’t know why I was doing it, and that I wasn’t able to stop myself.

As I got older, a few people began to notice. If they didn’t ask, I knew by the look they gave me. When they did ask, I took a deep breath and wished the conversation away. When that, too, failed and questions still hung, unanswered, I answered them. And more times than not, I received positive responses. Many people shared something they held close to them, which they now felt safe to share with me. We connected over our deeply held, often shameful secrets. Twice people shared that they also had Trich.

Despite getting responses that were the complete opposite of what I had anticipated (including discovering that others in my own life walked around with the same shame as me), I still didn’t feel safe sharing my secret. In serious relationships with men in particular, I hid it as long as possible. When they did find out, I prayed they wouldn’t leave me. They never did. But even knowing that people were accepting, I still wasn’t ready to really share. I was holding onto those few negative responses from when I was a girl. I couldn’t let go of them, and they were running my show.

I’m not exactly sure what changed or why, but one day I decided I was going to test the waters. I started by telling just a few friends that I had Trich. Trusted friends. Every single one was 100% accepting, and yet again I found that sharing had others take the opportunity to share. They told me secrets they had always feared revealing. They shared of themselves.

This got me thinking. Whenever I shared my secret, I consistently created an opportunity for those closest to me to share theirs. I was creating a space for them to get something off of their chests that they’d been holding for years. I never saw it coming, but it was beautiful when it did.

I began to get a little more bold. I stood up in a two hundred person seminar in which the topic was self-development and brain patterns, and shared my secret yet again. The instructor actually thanked me and went on to explain to everyone that at some point during my childhood when my brain patterns formed, probably after a traumatic event, I began to pull my hair, and it became a more ingrained pattern. He was grateful I had spoken up, as it was an excellent example of the lesson he was teaching. And significantly, on the next break, quite a few people hugged me, thanked me, and again shared something about themselves. There it was again: an opportunity to connect with others.

I still wasn’t ready to share with everyone, but I found myself telling more and more people. Finally something came over me. I decided to go all out. I wrote an article and submitted it to The Huffington Post – the most public of forums I could think of (after all, once something is on the internet, it’s out forever). I’m still not really sure what prompted me to make that decision. Maybe I was guided by something greater than myself. Maybe I was just ready. At any rate, once I submitted it my nerves took over. The same negative chatter spun in my head: What if people didn’t like or love me? What if they judged me or, even worse, told others what a freak I was? If published, it would be irreversible. When people googled me, it would be one of the first things that came up. My secret would become public knowledge.
As I peeled back the negative layers, I noticed I was still nervous. Why? That was when I realized that in fact, I was even more nervous that my article would never be published. I was afraid no one would ever read my words, that others living with TTM would still feel utterly alone. I realized that I wanted to share, because it was an opportunity.

A few days later I got the news. My story was going to be published! Not only was it published, it was featured on the AOL News Homepage. I cried. I was elated and proud. And what followed next I could have never predicted.

As soon as the article came out, friends who’d never known my secret called, texted and emailed. They said I was beautiful, even brave. At least five said they’d been living with the same disorder, also living in fear and shame. Three had never told anyone before me. Again, my sharing had opened up an opportunity for others to safely share what they’d never shared before. They knew I would love, accept, and understand them, and never judge them.

I had no idea the larger impact that would come of my piece. People from all over the United States read my piece, as did those from the UK, Sweden and Ireland. The comments left under the article itself were beautiful. Most resonated with what I had written and shared this could have been their own stories. I was thanked for being the voice people couldn’t voice themselves. But perhaps the most meaningful connections came from mothers who found me on Facebook, asking me to speak with their teenage daughters. Their girls with Trich were shutting them out because they felt their mothers would “never understand,” and the mothers were desperate for someone to get through. I’m now speaking to quite a few of these girls. Really all I am providing them is an opportunity to feel they are not alone, an opportunity to feel truly understood. And that’s what I realized I was also providing to a wider audience: I was beginning to create a community for those who had felt lonely, misunderstood, unliked, and worst of all, unloved from the shame they were carrying. Speaking my own truth had given others the opportunity to speak theirs, to feel loved and share themselves with people from all over the world. I was stunned. I had done that.

While there are days when I struggle with those same negative voices I used to hear so often, now there is another voice. It is the voice that tells me that who I am is a gift. It says that sharing my story is a gift. It reminds me that I am not only a gift to my loved ones, but to the larger community of people who need someone like me to speak up and show the world that we are a group of amazing human beings. We happen to have a disorder in which we pull out our hair; underneath that, we’re human beings: flawed, blundering, ashamed, hopeful, sensitive, often misunderstood, sometimes deeply understood, and beautiful. Without that same disorder, I might not have had the chance to remind both myself and others that this is who I am. Who we are.

So: is Trichotillomania an opportunity?
Yes. It is.

Read more posts by Sandy on her website: http://myopportunityis.com/trichotillomania-hair-pulling/

By tlcprograms | Posted in Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments (7)

February 13, 2013 – 2:55 pm

Guest Post by Marcia, parent of a trichster

If I had a magic wand I would wave it over my daughter and she would magically stop pulling her hair. I started having this wish when my daughter was a nine year old. That’s when she first started pulling. At first it was seen in uneven edges around her bangs—a little pulling here and there of her beautiful blonde scalp hair. By the time she was eleven it started to become more noticeable and from then on until now, at the age of 17, she is pulling scalp hair, eyebrows, and pubic hair.

Both my husband and I are nurses. We are smart people who have the educational background to figure out solutions to many problems. But this one was more challenging than the others we’ve dealt with in our own practice. For one, this was our daughter, not someone else’s daughter for whom we could provide nursing care. This girl was a member of our family—a much more difficult family assessment to make than when someone else’s daughter is admitted to the hospital for a surgical procedure or an acute illness. So, we resorted to what parents do when they have no control over situations and have little understanding of what is happening. We screamed and yelled at the sight of clumps of hair in the sink or in the car. We cried when she returned home after her first week back to school in the fall with over half of her scalp hair pulled out. We argued with one another about the best way to deal with her pulling. We advised her brother to stop telling kids at school that his sister “has issues” when they would ask him why her hair is so thin. We tried koosh balls, gloves, soft brushes and endless other ideas to prevent her from pulling. We tried incentives. Countless well-meaning friends and family members gave us ideas to get her to stop pulling or pointed out how much and how often she was pulling. They peppered us with questions:  Is it related to anxiety? Is it because of the fetal alcohol history? Why does she do it? Will there be a time that her hair follicle is destroyed and doesn’t grow back?

Making the situation all the more complex is that our daughter  was adopted at the age of five. We know little about her background so information about genetic linkages is interesting but doesn’t mean a lot to us since her brother doesn’t pull. As “good” nurses and “good” adoptive parents we read multiple books about attachment, post-traumatic stress, fetal-alcohol effects/disorder and other behavioral challenges that occur in some adoptive children. She has been diagnosed with ADHD, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and Anxiety. As nurses, we know how to use our resources. We live in a metropolitan area with ready access to child psychiatrists, child therapists, and even a renowned hypnotherapist who has specialized in the treatment of trichotillomania. We took our little girl to see all of these people. The psychiatrist continues to follow her and provide mental health care with medications that have yet to provide consistent results. The child therapist told us that she couldn’t continue to work with our daughter because she lied too frequently. The hypnotherapist informed us that she wasn’t participating in the therapy and so we chose to terminate rather than waste time and money since she wasn’t ready to engage in the therapy. Given this we’re holding off on cognitive-behavioral therapy at this time.

One of the many suggestions made by well-meaning friends was to purchase a wig. We did just that—and within 5 months she pulled almost all the hair out of the acrylic wig. We thought that maybe a human hair wig would work better. We purchased one for her and within another 6 months she had pulled out most of the hairs of that wig as well. We were at wits end and then, when accompanying her to the salon where she was fitted her with a wig, I saw a pamphlet published by the Trichotillomania Learning Center “I have trichotillomania (trick o til o may nee ah)” Spelled out in a way that my reading challenged daughter could read, answering questions using understandable descriptions/ terms, and most importantly leading my husband and I to discover the Trichotillomania Learning Center.

Many of you reading this personal account are likely to be able to identify with much of what I’ve written. Like you, I have read many of the publications on the TLC site and countless other articles published by members of the Scientific Advisory Board. However, in some ways I might be different from you. I am a PhD prepared nurse educator teaching nursing at a local university and am a published nurse researcher. The point I am making is that because of my professional background one would expect that I would somehow know more about this disorder than the average consumer. But I didn’t and I learned so much since I first started my reading. Now I have much more knowledge that I can share with students in my classroom and school nurse colleagues.

However, more personally, it has taken a good deal of time for my husband and I to realize that although we have no idea why our daughter continues to pull her hair (that journey of discovery we’re still traveling together) and despite my PhD in adolescent health care, I ignored much of what I had learned in my studies about adolescent development and parenting. I could see the normal developmental struggles we encountered as Anya tried out her growing independence when we set limits about the hour of the night we expected her to return home. However, I didn’t connect a similar struggle for achieving autonomy while pulling with my own unwillingness to relinquish my needs to continue to protect, control and maintain responsibility for pulling behavior that I believed would in some way embarrass her or our family. In other words control is not support. I am here to provide suggestions. She takes them into consideration or ignores what I have to say.

I share this reflection because I believe that parenting an adolescent is challenging and from my experience parenting an adolescent with trichotillomania is even more challenging. I don’t know all of Anya’s family history and indeed it is complex, but for me it points out the fact that each individual struggling with pulling is unique. There are similarities among “pullers” and investigation into these similarities will bring us closer to a greater understanding of the disorder. Likewise, there are similarities among individuals parenting an adolescent with this diagnosis. Studying these similarities will bring us closer to a better understanding of how to parent in a way that supports independence and efforts at treatment but doesn’t attempt to control behavior. Many members of the TLC community are engaged in these investigations.  I hold great hope both in discovery of successful treatments for the disorder and for interventions aimed at parenting, particularly with adolescent pullers. ~Marcia

By tlcprograms | Posted in Hair Pulling, parent, Resources, Sharing, Treatment, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Comments (17)

Top 5 Ways for Parents to MAKE SOME NOISE

January 23, 2013 – 11:21 am
 
by Wendy, parent of a beautiful trichster

As parents were are tireless advocates for our children.  We spend hours coaching sports teams, volunteering at school, tussling with the PTA, finding just the right camp and DRIVING for days on end.  It’s time to put some of this energy into MAKING SOME NOISE about Trichotillomania.

I am a mom of a 10-year old with Trich.  Like most of us, I was horrified, befuddled and helpless when she started pulling.  Trich was a complete unknown to me.  I was embarrassed and freaked out.  But, now it’s been over a year since she started.  My daughter is managing.  As a family we have worked hard to understand Trich.  We now reach out to our friends, teachers and health care providers to educate them about Trich.  My daughter feels empowered by her knowledge, less burdened by shame since we try to talk openly with others and supported by her community.  Now it’s your turn to MAKE SOME PARENT NOISE!

1. Be Rowdy at School!  

  • At the beginning of the school year talk to your child’s principal, teacher, nurse and school psychologist about Trich.  Provide them with the TLC materials and the TLC website.  DO THIS EVERY YEAR!  Update them on new findings.
  • If necessary establish a formal agreement with the school for accommodations for your child.  My daughter gets to wear a hat or gloves and have fidgets with her in the classroom.   REVIEW THIS EVERY YEAR.

2.       Be Disruptive in the Classroom!

  • Give a presentation on Trich to your child’s classroom.  Leave lots of room for questions.  Of course, get your child’s agreement on this, or encourage them to make a presentation on their own.  I talked to my daughter’s 3rd grade class about Trich and the kids had a ton of thoughtful questions.  Once they had a better understanding, my daughter’s pulling was not such a big deal to them.
  • Volunteer to start an anti-bullying education program at school.  My daughter’s school has implemented Project Cornerstone.  http://www.projectcornerstone.org/.  Get involved!

3. Be Heard at the Doctor’s Office!

  • Every doctor my daughter sees (I mean everyone:  pediatrician, eye doctor, dentist) receives TLC materials.  When asked “Are you familiar with Trich”, well- meaning doctors will respond:  “Well, yes… I have heard of this”.  Take this response as a “No” and start educating!!

 4. Be a Boisterous at Camp and After-School!

  • Think of the hundreds of kids that camp counselors and after-school care providers see each week!!!  When signing your kid up for programs- let the care-givers know that she has Trich.  Why mention it?  Why not!!  Think of this as an opportunity to get the word out.  Include the TLC website and materials.  Maybe you can help out another family!

5.       Be Loud and Proud!

  • Tell your friends about Trich.  Tell your family.  Post it on Facebook.  Tweet!  Throw off your own feelings of shame.  Be honest about this.  If you are ashamed or embarrassed you will only reflect this back to your kid.   When someone says to you, “What’s wrong with your kid’s hair?” say “She has Trichotillomania.  It’s a neurological disorder characterized by……”  This will (1) get them to shut-up and (2) give them some real information.   Get out there and talk about it.  Just think how many people talk about their colons these days!

Always remember, get the support YOU need by reaching out to others.  Take care of yourself (easy to say but hard to do).  It’s not easy, but you’ll find people willing to help you, if you make some noise!

By TLC | Posted in Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , | Comments (1)

Guest Post: Kay’s Story

January 2, 2013 – 11:14 am

My story is not necessarily a success story, or it might not be from your point of view. But, for me it is a success story. I was very young when I started pulling. I started with my eyelashes and from there continued onto my eyebrows. I do not know how many times I have tried to stop since I started pulling. Only one time did I succeed, and even then I stilled pulled some, but since I was pulling so few it was not very obvious.

I consider my story a success because of where I am now. And I want to be an encouragement to others. It is not easy to reach the point that I have reached in my journey. It is a journey. Each day I make a choice and that choice affects the direction that my journey will take me. Generally my decision is to continue on the same path. While this may not be considered the best option, I have learned to accept me for who I am. I do not think that I will ever understand why God has allowed me to be who I am, a puller, but I know that in some way or how He is using me for part of His big plan.

I have had to overcome being extremely self-conscious. I thought that I was ugly because that was how I was choosing to see myself. I was letting my feelings of guilt for pulling “change” my physical appearance. I cannot say that I feel beautiful every day, but I can say that the majority of days I do.  It is all about getting up out of the bed and turning my face into the sun and knowing that God and many people love me. And remembering that I need to love myself.  I must love who I am.

My way of dealing with the fact that I have almost no eyelashes or eyebrows is using eyeliner and eyebrow-liner. It actually works quite well. Another thing I had to overcome was the feeling that I was hiding behind my makeup. I have come to realize that I am not hiding. I am simply being the person that I am and living life. Interestingly enough I get compliments on my makeup and people are surprised to learn that I do it myself and that I do it every single day. That has helped me to be more confident about my makeup.

People never see me without makeup. Only a few people have seen me in recent years with little makeup on and that is in the morning when I have not had time to wipe off the old makeup and put on the new. The other day I did something that I thought that I would never be able to do. I did my makeup in front of my best friend. That was a big step for me and it was completely worth it. My hands were shaking, but I was able to do it! It amazed me because to me accomplishing that means that I am comfortable with who I am.

The last thing that I want to say is that I hope that the people that read my story will realize that they too can overcome their difficulties. Even the things that we see as impossible are not! Anything is possible: Never give up hope.

~Kay

By TLC | Posted in Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , | Comments (5)

Why I Give to TLC

December 21, 2012 – 3:09 pm

On a Memorial Day weekend twelve years ago, our daughter (almost nine years old at the time) pulled half of her eyelashes. The effect upon her and the whole family was profoundly unsettling and disruptive.

In her suffering, she was unable to explain what she had done or why she had done it. As parents, we loudly demanded that she change her behavior. Even though she was not quite nine years old, we thought that she could control this behavior when presented with a high enough level of threatened punishment. How sadly mistaken we were.

We went from psychologist to psychologist. None knew how to treat Trich. One psychiatrist put our beautiful daughter on a medicinal regimen that actually aggravated the urge to pull. It was the worst month of pulling in our daughter’s life.

For those who have a loved one with this disease, we don’t have to tell of the heartbreaking emotions, rejections and whispered slights felt by the sufferer. The isolation is compounded when in public. The looks of shock and surprise are hard not to notice.

We do not recall how we came to know of TLC, but we will never forget the first time calling and hearing Christina’s calm and reassuring voice on the other end. She reached out and touched these bewildered parents.

It is vital to learn the causes and contributing factors of trichotillomania. Only then is it possible to test and compare different treatment modalities. This can only be accomplished through research – and good research costs money.

We are grateful for the unceasing generosity and efforts put forth by Christina and her cohorts and supporters at TLC. We would not know of this disorder were it not for the suffering of our daughter. We consider it a privilege to be able to help bring comfort and knowledge to other sufferers and their loved ones. We are humbled by the true compassion that Christina and TLC bring to helping others to learn to cope.

As recipients of this largesse, we believe it an honor to contribute on an annual basis to help continue this mission.

Maryam and Edward, TLC Members

By TLC | Posted in Uncategorized | Comments (2)

Call for Articles

November 21, 2012 – 11:56 am

Call for Articles!

TLC is looking for personal stories and professional articles about living with and recovering from hair pulling and skin picking, for publication in our quarterly member newsletter and/or the TLC Blog.  These stories and articles will be used for publication in our quarterly member newsletter and/or the TLC Blog.  We are especially interested in stories by/for men, teen girls and boys, and about skin picking.

Submissions should be 500-2500 words, typed and emailed to leslie@trich.org.  Please include your full name and contact info for TLC, as well as your name and/or email as you’d you would like it published. Articles and story ideas are accepted year-round. Newsletter publication deadlines are Dec. 5, Feb. 5, May 5, and July 5.

If you have a story idea not listed here, please share it in the comments below, or email TLC’s Program Manager, Leslie, at leslie@trich.org.

Topic ideas include:

~ Telling friends/family about pulling/picking: what made you decide to tell? How did you approach them? How did they react? How did it change your life, better or worse?

~ Stories of recovery, triumph, acceptance, loving yourself, creating awareness, etc.

~ Stories from men and boys: long under-represented but equally as impacted, we would love to publish personal stories from men and/or boys, parents of boys, etc.

~ Tips and strategies for not pulling eyelashes

~ Tips for skin pickers: strategies, cosmetics, etc.

~Poetry

~Original artwork

Or, if you are a treatment provider:

~ Case Studies

~ Evidence-based treatment approaches

~ Research Abstracts

~ Management of BFRBs in conjunction with comorbid disorders

Thank you for your consideration!

By TLC | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a Comment